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Doc Love Success Coach

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Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love

Hey Doc,

Although I know you usually only comment on people with specific dating questions, I was wondering what your take was on the television show Average Joe. My opinion is, after watching two outings, that the women’s behavior reflects a lot of your teachings.

On the show, a bunch of “average guys” (i.e., guys who aren’t great-looking and have little experience with Beautiful Women), get to compete for the attentions and affections of an extremely hot-looking babe. The twist comes at the end, where after several dates with the average guys, a couple of hunky stud-muffins enter the picture to complicate things.

How this relates to your “System” (which I purchased, and it helped a lot, thanks!) is that the average guys, besides being just average-looking, are not a Challenge at all. In fact, they constantly laid out their hearts and bared their souls to the Beautiful Women only to be repeatedly dumped at the conclusion of the contest.

At the end of both competitions, the beautiful girl surprisingly (but maybe not to those who read your articles) picked the good-looking guy over the average guy, despite only knowing them for a short time. The icing on the cake was that the good-looking guys were emotionally remote and looked like they could care less.

What’s really funny is all the comments on the net that crucify the women on the show for being so shallow. That may be true, but all us average Joes want them anyway, right?

What do you think, Doc? Do guys like us ever really have a chance with Beautiful Women? Is it even worth the struggle? Or should we stay with our own kind and not risk all that rejection?

Lenny - who still has his fantasies of scoring a “10”

Hi Lenny,

First of all, let me congratulate you on starting to learn my techniques. You’ll never go wrong practicing a set of proven principles. As my cousin “Fast Eddie” Love likes to say, “With a little spit and polish, you’re gonna be a master!” That is, as long as you stay with it. Dedication and practice are the keys.

But it’s obvious by your comments about Average Joe that you’re already sharpening your analytical faculties when it comes to the dating game and are on the right road. Nevertheless, I want to touch on some of the specifics of your letter to make sure you stay there.

Let’s start with this: Lenny, the average guys should be dumped at the end of the show. Besides being just average-looking, they’re not Challenges. So they have two things working against them. Why wouldn’t they be dumped? It’s common sense, right?

You mention that the hotties on Average Joe go for the hunks “despite” knowing them for only a short time. Here your premise is dead wrong, pal. It’s BECAUSE the girls only knew them for a brief period of time that they picked them. Look at it from the girl’s perspective: if she doesn’t know two guys all that well, and one’s good-looking and the other isn’t, what’s going to happen? Think about it. Let’s reverse the process. If you’re given a choice between two women, and one’s nothing much in the looks category and one’s a ringer for Elizabeth Hurley, who are you going to pick? Maybe the gorgeous babe has a lousy personality and the other doesn’t, but how are you going to know that in a short amount of time?

Next, you report that the good-looking guys appear as if they could care less. Well, this is what you average guys should be doing! The ploy worked, didn’t it? Nobody is attracted to desperation (ie., baring of souls, wearing of hearts on sleeves, blubbering about weaknesses, etc.). The name of the game, at least at first, is pretending you don’t care. Being secure and mysterious. In other words, being a CHALLENGE. That’s what you have to do in the beginning, whether she’s an average woman or the second coming of Kim Basinger. Do it, and watch what happens. It never fails, buddy.

There’s another reason why the women on Average Joe went with the guys who are the best-looking. Why? Because it is short-term. I’d like to come back six months later and check whether those babes are still dating the hunks. Did they pick the handsome dudes because they think it’s the right thing to do since they’re on TV? You can bet the house those romances aren’t going very far.

Do average guys ever really have a chance with the Beautiful Woman you ask? Ah, now that’s the million-dollar question. And a million-dollar question demands a million-dollar answer. As Sal “The Fish” Love puts it, “The first thing you have to do if you want a chance with a Beautiful Woman is get yourself a 120-foot yacht. A big, humongous, 120-foot yacht!”

Of course, that would be doing things the hard way. And you don’t have to do it the hard way, Lenny. It’s not going to be a struggle if you memorize what I teach you. I make it easy to deal with Beautiful Women as well as wallflowers -- all women. The years of torment you’ve endured at the hands of the opposite sex will be over once you stick completely to my guidelines.

To you Psych majors, what you’re looking for anyway is Attitude. As long as you’re attracted to a woman, and she’s a Giver and she’s Flexible, she’s going to be the one for you. And over time she will grow prettier and end up being the Beautiful Woman you’ve always wanted because of her inner qualities – qualities that a lot of the plastic women don’t have. In an age of phonies, my plan leads you to the genuine article. And that, not some silicone fake, is who you want for the long haul.

Lenny, a fundamental fact of life is that you’re always risking rejection. When you get into the bathtub you can slip and break your neck. When you climb into your car you can be killed in a smashup. You can be asleep in your bed and an airplane engine can come crashing through the roof and land on your head. (Don’t laugh – it’s happened.) Life is one huge risk. Every time you breathe you’re taking the risk of rejection and pain. There’s no way around it except to stop living. So get out there and have some fun.

As I’ve said in my books, practice on the average-looking girls with the huge fannies and slowly make your way up to the razor-thin beauties. By the time you get there, you’ll be irresistible. The way you’re going to get a “10” is to memorize all my principles.

Remember, guys: if you want somebody beautiful, you have to practice on somebody average.

To send me your love questions or to find out more about The "System," visit me at or call (800)  404-2644.

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"

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