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Doc Love Success Coach

New Article Every Thursday



 Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love

Dear Doc Love,

I am a woman who has been around the block at least once, and I just have to tell you that I think your advice is very accurate and honest. I am 38, divorced, have children (with whom I have a very open rapport about everything from sex to politics), and I have the most incredible relationship with the most wonderful man on this earth! It is actually he who introduced me to your column, and he still reads it to me every week.

Doc, one of the most amazing things about my sweetheart is that all the things that you promote and teach men seem to come very naturally to him. He has been mysterious, a Challenge (it was definitely me that did all the pursuing), and I cannot think of a man that has been more intriguing to me. He is extremely romantic, loving and committed all at the same time.

You know the funny thing is that when Randy first read me your column, the modern, slightly defensive side of me said, "Horsefeathers!" But ironically, on closer examination of your response, when he and I discussed it and I actually put myself in that situation, I realized that you really have a very realistic understanding of male/female dynamics and behaviors.

I am quite happy and proud to say that I love being a woman and everything that that means to me. I love being able to create life and nurture it and experience the most incredible pleasure, all within the same body. I love being able to dress up and look good for my sweetheart, or just wear no makeup and be casual with him. I love sending him little cards and gifts just to tell him that I love him, or being there to offer him a glass of wine and a shoulder when he has had a rough day. I love shopping for beautiful outfits as much for my own pleasure as for his, and I love the feeling of his warmth next to me at night. And he appreciates it all and shows it in return.

So, to all the women out there who find my behavior and attitude offensive and weak (and I'm sure there are a few), all I have to say is that I just don't care. Maybe they need to open up their minds and hearts and stop denying their feminine sides, and then they will see just how much they receive in return when they give instead of holding back. Until that time I really believe that they are missing out on something truly wonderful.

In the meantime Doc, keep up the good work! Anyone who gives candid and honest advice on how to improve relationships (both single and married) is doing us all a HUGE service.


Karen - the non-politically correct "girly-girl"

Hi Karen,

It's refreshing to hear from a woman like you. You get an A plus in the attitude department and Randy is a very lucky guy.

To your credit, you've ignored the Feministas who have tried to convince women that they must compete with men and "beat them at their own game." But many of your sisters have been brainwashed and have become Amazon warriors, striving to outdo men and show them who's the better "man." Ironically, the further down that road they go, the more unhappy they become.

Men don't want to compete with women. They may be momentarily impressed with a gal who can ruthlessly kick butt and play 'hardball' harder than the best of the boys, but she's not the type they'd be drawn to have as the mother of their children. The enlightened woman, like you, Karen, knows that her true source of power is her femininity.

You know that as a woman you have choices in the way that you get what you want and need from the man in your life. A woman can try to control her man with criticism and nagging, or she can use her feminine grace to motivate him.

A woman does not give up her power when she is sweet and supportive. Rather, she empowers both her man and herself. A good woman makes her man feel like he's a better man than he knows he really is. And, when he's receiving that level of support and appreciation, he's happy to do what makes her happy. It's a win/win kind of a situation.

Also, what helps to make it all work so well for you, Karen, is that you are with a man who is mature enough to appreciate your giving nature without trying to take advantage. And, you both have mutually high romantic interest in each other.

To you men out there, Karen is the kind of gal you want to be with, someone who is a real giver.

Remember, guys, always pick a girl who is sweet and loving.

To send me your love questions or to find out more about The "System," visit me at or call (800)  404-2644.

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"

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