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Doc Love Success Coach

New Article Every Thursday



 Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love

Dear Doc Love,

I've checked out several of your articles and I must tell you that I am appalled at what I've read.

You seem to think that any woman who isn't anorexic is not worth the time of day. What's with you? You make fun of Oprah and Rosie O'Donnell for being overweight, and then you praise skinny women with plastic breasts. Did you ever consider that perhaps Rosie and Oprah are the size they are because that's the way nature made them? Why should they starve themselves for men's approval?

Many loving sweet kind women are overlooked because they don't fit your of rigid standards of beauty. I encourage you to check out the following facts and figures:

There are 3 billion women who don't look like supermodels and only a handful who do.

- Marilyn Monroe wore a size 14.

- If Barbie were a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due to her exaggerated proportions.

- The average woman weighs 144 lb. and wears between a size 12-14.

- The models in the magazines are airbrushed - not perfect!

- A psychological study in 1995 found that three minutes spent looking at a fashion magazine caused 70% of women readers to feel depressed, guilty, and shameful.

- Models twenty years ago weighed 8% less than the average woman. Today they weigh 23% less.

And even though I know that you'll laugh at this, I'm including a little poem for you Doc, as food for thought.

~ Beauty of a Woman ~

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears
The figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair
The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes
Because that is the doorway to her heart
The place where love lies
The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul

Lucinda - who thinks that you are a total bigot Doc Love

Dear Lucinda,

The Bible says that gluttony is a sin. But when I watch overweight preachers on TV Sunday morning they speak only of the other six deadly sins. Why? Because in America, fat is sacred.

Yesterday I saw an obese woman using a cane to waddle her way through the supermarket because she couldn't carry her own weight. With her tree trunk calves and her tiny feet in her tiny shoes, she looked like a 747 sporting Volkswagen tires.

Now, Lucinda, I know what you would say about her. You'd say she's not responsible for her slovenly, self-destructive eating habits. She can't and need not control how much she eats. She should be able to look however she wants and not be judged on her appearance. And everyone knows that it wouldn't be politically correct to criticize her.

Well I don't care how much the various "full figured" gals may glorify their excess poundage. Fat is not beautiful and, more importantly, it's not healthy. Overweight people are at risk for diabetes, heart attacks, high blood pressure and wearing out the living room carpet before its time. Food is meant to be used for fuel, not as a way to escape life's problems.

When a man picks a potential long-term partner, he must first look at her Interest Level. Then through the process of dating, he should evaluate her habits and attitudes. Does she have integrity? Is she a giver or a taker? Is she structured or flexible? Is she self-reliant? Is she a functioning adult? Does she practice self-control or is she run by her emotions? And does she have any unhealthy habits or addictions like, drugs, tobacco or FOOD!

Most importantly, I want men to pick women who are not overweight for partners so they will raise the kids to be healthy and not have eating disorders. Statistics show that if the parents are overweight, 90% of the time the kids also turn out to have weight problems.

Lucinda, please allow me to clear up something. I've never said that all women should be model thin. Nature has made both ectomorphs and endomorphs of both genders. And each body type has its corresponding healthy weight range (and unhealthy weight range.)

Additionally, different men have different tastes in women. Some men prefer medium sized gals and some get excited about gals who are on the hefty side. America is a free country and to each his own. But the Reality Factor says that the majority of men prefer women who are not overweight. Like it or not Lucinda, that's the way it is on the street, just as women prefer wealthy men to guys who are on welfare.

Lucinda, let's get real. Be honest. Imagine that you had a friend who was trying to set you up with a handsome, charming fellow who weighed 300 pounds and would crush a camel if he tried to ride one. When you told your friend (as you surely would) that "he's just not my type," would you be any different from a guy who rejects a pretty girl because she's the same height and weight as Oprah?

By the way, the reason that models now weigh 23% less than the average woman instead of 8% less is because the average woman is now 15% heavier than she was 20 years ago. The models aren't getting thinner. People are getting fatter! Government statistics report that over 40% of the population are clinically overweight. To you Psych majors - they're obese.

Now you've provided us with another interesting statistic Lucinda. Seven out of ten women get bummed out when they look at fashion magazines. But curiously, women don't seem to feel depressed, guilty and shameful enough when they look at those magazines to stop buying those magazines.

Now here is a poem for you, Lucinda:

Roses are red, violets are blue. If you want your girlfriend to look like Oprah, just have her eat like her too.

Remember, guys, if she's fat now, just wait until after you've said "I do."

To send me your love questions or to find out more about The "System," visit me at or call (800)  404-2644.

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"

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