DATING
IS A NUMBERS GAME
Women
Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love
Dear Doc Love:
I had to comment on the advice you gave to your guys about the woman who refuses to give
out her phone number which, you say, shows her low Interest Level.
I don't agree that that means she must have a low level of interest. I would never give
out my phone number without first getting to know the person. You never asked whether the
woman had possibly been subjected to repeated phone calls and messages left on her
answering machine. Why should anyone have to change their phone number?
You said that a woman is supposed to take chances for a guy she's dying to see but the guy
isn't supposed to take chances. You say that if she's not flexible, she's out, period.
What happened to a guy being flexible?
You're telling men to size up women as if they're purchasing a car. Why don't you start by
teaching people to respect one another? This isn't a battle. It's a date.
Mary Angela - who thinks you, should be going for anger management, not giving out advice
Hi Mary Angela,
Speaking of car purchases, I just sold my Toyota truck to buy my PT Crusier. (The Toyota
was in perfect condition and I had all the maintenance records.) I love statistics so I
kept track of the potential buyers who called. The 17th caller bought the truck but the
first 16 had a lot in common. They all asked a lot of questions.
Some said they would call back when they had time to come over to see it but never did.
Some made appointments to come over to drive it and never showed up.
A few drove the truck but for some reason - "I don't have any money" was the
best - did not buy it. One buyer called every other day to find out if I had sold it, but
he somehow never had the time to come over and take a look at it.
The guy who bought it - No. 17 - did something the others didn't. He asked no questions
over the phone except, "What's your address? I'll be there in 20 minutes." He
came over, drove it for a couple of miles and handed me the cash (not a check.)
As you can see, I had to weed through sixteen lookyloos and strokers. Sixteen bored and
lonely people who entertained themselves by wasting my time. The odds in dating should be
so good.
The point is: only number seventeen had high Interest Level.
"The System" is an efficiency program. It filters out the Low Interest
Looky-loos, the Feministas, the Psychos, the Controllers, the Golddiggers, and the
Professional Daters. It shows men who the REAL women are. How? By teaching the fine art
and science of observing and interpreting women's actions.
Now allow me to point out, Mary Angela, that you are seriously deluded when you say that I
think that a man shouldn't take chances in dating. On the contrary, if a man endeavors to
be successful in dating he must be prepared to take risks constantly. It's the man who has
to put his ego on the line in every phase of the dating process.
It's the man who must approach the woman, strike up a conversation and make her laugh.
It's the man who has to ask for her home phone number. It's the man who must call the
woman and ask her out. It's the man who must make the move for the first kiss. He faces
rejection constantly, at every turn. All that the woman must do is show up and look good.
Without ever once risking rejection in her entire lifetime she can still have her choice
of thousands of men to date.
Every day, tens of thousands of men dutifully face rejection from women and are given no
credit for it by women. Women expect men to take all the risks of initiating and consider
it men's job to do so.
Ask any woman if she'd like to trade places with men and the ones who answer honestly will
all tell you "No thanks." Often they'll add something like; "Oh I tried
that. I took the initiative and asked a guy out once, and he didn't like it. I think that
men are threatened when a woman is aggressive. I'll never try that again."
They get rejected ONCE and then give up forever. Besides that, they blame the guy. If guys
chickened out so easily no one would ever have any dates!
If a guy asks two women at a club for their home phone numbers and one gives it to him,
but the other says, "It's better if I call you," which woman is he more likely
to have a relationship with? If a guy asks two women at a party for their home phone
numbers and one gives it to him and the other says, "Give me your business
card," which one is he more likely to go the distance with?
My students are taught to call twice and then if the woman does not accept and keep a
date, to throw her number away. Apparently, Mary Angela, you've had some bad experiences,
but not with my boys because you would have been history before they never called.
Remember, guys, dating is a numbers game.
To send me your love questions or to find out more about The
"System," visit me at http://www.doclove.com
or call (800) 404-2644.
Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars.
For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with
one man versus another?"
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