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Doc Love Success Coach

New Article Every Thursday



 Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love

Dear Doc Love,

I'm Preston. I'm 33 and I'm a fitness trainer at an upscale gym in Manhattan. I don't seem to have any trouble meeting hot looking women at all. Sometimes I actually have more women coming onto me than I can deal with. I know it sounds like I'm bragging but it's true. The problem is that I seem to keep winding up with girls who give me a hard time.

For instance, I've been spending time with this one girl named Becky. She's about two inches taller than I am (I'm 5'10") and she's drop dead gorgeous. Of course she's a model and an aspiring actress. We've been out twice now, and I'm really attracted to her.

So yesterday we were taking a nice walk through Central Park, enjoying the day, when she starts asking me all these intense questions about my past relationships and insists that I explain why I've never been married. She was so intense. I felt like no matter what I said, it wouldn't be what she wanted to hear.

Then she goes on a rant about how all men are dishonest and cheat and use women in one way or another. And then she says: "So Preston, do you use women?" I mean she was acting like a cop from internal affairs who knew that I was guilty and was insisting that I admit it.

The rest of the time we were together yesterday, she was totally cool and we had fun. But I can tell she's going to come on heavy again. If there's a way to get her to lighten up I'd like to know, because she has a lot of other nice qualities and she's exactly my type physically. Any suggestions Doc?

Preston - who wants to know how to handle her

Hi Preston,

She's not the problem. You're the problem. You've got all these hot women coming onto you. Great! But what's up with you that you only choose ones who hassle you? Why don't you hang out with one who doesn't bust your chops? I mean, why be with a demanding, high maintenance chick when there are plenty of sweet ones out there? Since you've got so many to choose from, pick a winner instead of a whiner. As my cousin Sal "The Fish" Love says: "Stay away from dogs that growl and people who growl."

Remember, the more beautiful the woman, the more spoiled and demanding she tends to be. I think you probably need to move down the beauty scale a notch or two, Preston, and practice using The "System." You're not prepared to handle this type of woman.

She's says that all men are users and that you're guilty until proven innocent. Why would you want to be with someone who has a chip on her shoulder? It's a big Red Flag. If this is how she behaves on the second date, can you imagine the grillings you'll be getting from her after she's put the ring through your nose and you've been married to her for a year?

And I'll tell you something else Preston. If you started ragging on women the way Becky has on men, she'd be telling all her girlfriends what a creep you were. Somehow women feel that it is completely legitimate to label the male gender, as commitment phobic, terrified of true intimacy. But what you never hear about on Sally and Oprah, is that there are just as many women as men out there who have intimacy and commitment issues - it's just politically correct to blame men for all our relationship problems. As every good Feminista tells us - "All men want to do is use and abuse women."

If Becky were average looking and acted as she has, you would have already gotten rid of her, Preston. Her beauty mesmerizes you and you are not thinking clearly. One of the worst things you can do is get involved with a hot looking woman with a bad attitude. Unfortunately, too many guys will put up with all kinds of abuse, just because the girl is gorgeous. It's dis-empowering to do that. Guys, you have to learn to not be willing to do anything for you know what. Just keep in mind that a girl who rates a 10 will sink to a 1 after she's nagged and badgered you for two months.

Preston, this girl is not going to stop doing what she does. And you're not going to change her. So move on to a groovier scenario. Check out the girls in the 7 to 8 range. It will be much easier to find one who's lighthearted and sweet. And at the same time keep taking your shots at the 10's because there are some out there who aren't high maintenance. But any hassle out of the chute, and it's Adios Baby!

Remember guys - the intelligent woman with high interest and a good attitude says to herself - "I'll find out all the things I want to know about this guy's character, over time. No need to be negative and demanding, it's un-feminine and ungraceful." So pick a sweetheart instead of a Nazi interrogator.

To send me your love questions or to find out more about The "System," visit me at or call (800)   404-2644.

Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"

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