WOMEN HATE NEEDY MEN
Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen
Success Coach - Doc Love
Hi Doc,
I can't figure this one out. The woman whom I'm dating shows high Interest Level in me
whenever we're together i.e. lots of affection, compliments, laughing at my dumb jokes,
etc. We see each other once or twice a week. It's usually a weekend together.
But she is a busy, successful realtor and does not respond quickly if at all to the
occasional phone call during the week. We have agreed to see each other exclusively so I
don't believe she is cheating on me.
Here's my question: Am I wasting my time when she is so wrapped up in work that by the
time she gets home during the week she is just dead-ass tired and does not want to call
anyone, even me?
My gut says dump her or tell her I will still date her but in the meantime I am going to
date others with the intent on finding someone who is not so wrapped up in work. Is it
unreasonable to expect a couple phone calls during the week?
Creon - who needs more attention
Hey Creon,
You're laboring under a belief that's not serving you. You're a lucky guy and you don't
even know it! Countless men who are in a serious relationship with a woman, are
guilt-tripped and p-whipped by their partners into feeling that they must continually
'check in.'
These guys can't go for more than 24 hours without having to call their wife or girlfriend
and give her a report on their activities. As my cousin Sal "The Fish" Love
would say, "Their woman turns into their prison warden."
And if one of these fellows is in a living -together situation with their gal, whenever
they leave the house they're also expected to inform her as to where they're going, for
how long and when they'll be home. (And if they're married, forget it!)
Sure, this kind of setup is emasculating. Yes, It's dis-empowering. But it's the norm for
all too many men and it's their own fault.
Learning to handle a controlling, demanding woman is good training, but it's also a lot of
work. A low maintenance relationship is always more fun and it looks like that's what
you've got here, Creon.
So I suggest that you chill out and enjoy the space and freedom that you have. You've got
the best of both worlds, a woman who digs you a whole lot AND plenty of time during the
week to do whatever the hell you want whenever you want.
Yes, perhaps your real estate wranglin' gal does have some work-aholic tendencies. Well,
hey, we've all got a few character flaws. Again, I recommend that you look on the bright
side and try to appreciate the cool deal you've got goin' on here.
Your woman's not some aspiring actress with constant car trouble who barely makes her rent
each month. No, she's a go-getter, a high achiever with a good income. I can tell that
this kitty cat isn't likely to ever expect you to be the sole provider, and that's a
groovy thing.
There's no point in pressuring your girlfriend into giving you more attention during the
week. She's not going to change and if you did pressure her then she would start to
perceive you as needy and insecure. That would, of course, lower her Interest Level, and
there's no good reason to do that. Let's keep her Interest Level in you up there at a high
elevation by staying cool.
Another smart move on your part would be to stop calling her during the week and leaving
messages. By ceasing to do that, you'll get double benefits. Not only will you end your
frustration but you'll also become more of a Challenge, which will raise her Interest
Level even higher.
Remember, guys: when you expose your insecurities to your girlfriend, you lower her
Interest Level.
To send me your love questions or to find out more about The "System," visit me
at http://www.doclove.com or call (800)
404-2644.
Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who coaches men in his seminars.
For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of women, "Why do you stay with
one man versus another?"
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